Sunday, March 4, 2012

Contentment

I feel like every blog I'm going to write for the next 7ish months will start with 'THIS DEPLOYMENT' so if your sick of hearing about it then just stop reading now my friend cause here it goes...
THIS DEPLOYMENT has made me go through soo many different emotions. In the almost 5 months Jordon has been gone we have gone through so much stinkin crap then I ever expected us to go through. I have defiantly had days where I feel like I hit rock bottom and I have no idea how I am going to keep moving forward.
Now let me just add this in, its not just about my husband being away from home for a year and I just miss him. Like I said it has brought up so many emotions about so many things. My husband is my best friend. I know that if I am having a bad day I can always go to him and he would make it better, or if I'm just simply having an "I'm a hideous monster" day I could go to him and he would make me feel beautiful again. He was my band aide for everything. Now with him gone I don't have that anymore, and him telling me everything is going to be ok over the internet just isn't the same as him giving me a kiss and saying, "babe your gorgeous, don't stress over the little things, you got this." in person. My security blanket is gone I guess you could say. So when I start to be hard on myself I have to work through it on my own.
Does this make sense? This wasn't even what I wanted to blog about but whatever I'm going with it...
Anyways deployments are poopy for more reasons than just having to miss your husband.
But deployment aside, I am so happy with where my life is right now. Nope nothing in our lives is going perfect, we get pooped on a lot but  I KNOW that this is where we are suppose to be at right now, and that feels SO good. I like to tell myself that Jordon has to be deployed right now cause if he wasn't things just might actually be perfect and nothing is perfect right?
I try really hard to avoid blogging when I am having a bad day cause I would sit here and just complain complain complain and that can get annoying pretty quick.  I don't want to go back and read about my bad days I want to read about the days where I remembered to count my blessings. Maybe thats why I haven't blogged very much... HA.

But today I am feeling blessed so today I blogged.


OH yes to actually update on things that have happened in our lives.... I turned the big 22 on Thursday and it was a surprisingly awesome birthday. I was absolutely dreading it but I ended up really enjoying it.
Also my always amazing husband was promoted to Specialist. He works SO hard and it makes me unbelievably happy to see him get rewarded for his hard work. I am such a proud wife.

1 comment:

Our Family of Four said...

i know it probably doesn't seem like it to you, but it seems like its going fairly quick (the deployment) and i hope that it goes fast for you! congrats to jordan for getting promoted, too! that is awesome!