Tuesday, November 15, 2011

1 Month Nolah

Nolah turned 1 month on the 9th. I can't believe it has already been a whole month. She has kept me pretty dang busy.
We are still breastfeeding, probably about every hour. I honestly don't even attempt to keep a schedule. If she acts hungry I'm gonna feed the poor girl. At night time Nolah likes to eat like she is getting ready for hibernation so I nurse her on both sides and then feed her about 4 oz of formula. Seriously is that normal for a 1 month old? She eats SOO dang much. She was weighed at the doctors about 2 weeks ago and was at 10lbs 5oz and I guarantee she has gained at least another pound since then. She's a big gal and I freakin love it. She got thrush a couple weeks ago and passed it on to me and we almost gave up on the breastfeeding cause that crap hurts. She and I got some medicine for it and it cleared up but its making its comeback on the both us. :/ yay. She wears mostly 3 month clothing.  I can squeeze her chub in some newborn onesies without them being skin tight.
She loves:
Staring at Daddy when we 'skype'
Listening to her big sis sing to her
The sound of the shower running
Having her momma hold her with her head laying on my shoulder and walking around. all. day.
When momma eats her toesies. She wants to giggle so bad. Cutest thing. EVER.
The boppy pillow.
Bath Time.
Mommas boobs. Lets be honest they are basically #1
She Hates:
The Car.
Going Shopping.
Binkys. Whenever I put one in her mouth she looks at me like OMG mom really? Gimme the real thing!
Getting her bum changed.
But I think she hates sitting in a poopy/wet diaper more. 
Changing her clothes.
Being cold.
Nolah is ridiculously cute and I don't think I will ever be able to get over just how cute she is. She is very temper-mental though. But dangit I just can never say no to her.
Someday when I have time I will put up some more pictures. But for now you get this silly one cause it makes me giggle.

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Never Enough

I get swept up in the moment of things. I never think to stop and take pictures. My mind is fully into what is happening around me, and with that I end up with zero pictures to bring me back to that moment later on down the road.
I tried my hardest to remember to take lots of pictures after I had Nolah. Especially pictures of Jordon with his girls. But again I got swept up in the moment and just spent every second I had soaking up my family being together for the short time we had.
All the pictures I did happen to get were all cell phone pictures and a majority of them blurry. But I still love them and I will cherish them especially during the months ahead. I am kicking myself now that I didn't get more.

The days after I had Nolah and before Jordon deployed were amazing. Everything just felt so perfect. We had a beautiful and healthy new baby girl. Nolah was a champ at breastfeeding. I was healing perfectly. Ellie loved her new role as big sister. We had no worries besides that one thing that we just kept pushing to the back of our minds and promising each other to not bring it up.
But of course that dreaded day came to fast, and we had to say good bye to Jordon. By far one of the hardest things I have ever done.  It makes my stomach physically sick to know that he wont be around for a whole year. Its been over 3 weeks since he has left and I'm starting to do a little better. Your brain really does switch to survival mode and you kind of just become numb. Its always the hardest at dinner time, or whenever I hear the neighbors garage door open. But Ellie and Nolah have been keeping me pretty busy. We have been working on sort of getting a routine together. Nolah just wants to eat and eat and eat so its hard splitting my attention between her and Ellie. Im worried that Ellie will feel pushed aside. But we will eventually get the hang of things I'm sure. We have a lot of adjusting to do. For now we are just taking one day at a time.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Then Came Nolah

 *If you don't want to read all the delish details or see extremely cute pictures of me then please do not read*

8 long days over due and we finally saw the light at the end of the tunnel.

I was scheduled to be induced October 8th. Of course I thought FOR SURE baby girl would decide to come before then. I did not want to be induced and Jordon and I tried everything we could to get this labor going on its own. Seriously everything. I had my membranes stripped 4 times, I did everything while bouncing on an exercise ball. We went on long walks everyday and Ellie and I would see who could skip the farthest. (Ellie won every time.) I drank red raspberry leaf tea all the time. I even tried castor oil, all it did was make me throw up. The list goes on and on.

October 8th came and no sign of labor. I took advantage of knowing ahead of time of when we would have the baby so I made sure my legs were nice and shaven, the house sparkly clean, and got all prettied up before hand. I was to call the hospital first thing in the morning to make sure there was room available.
Gave the hospital a phone call. NO beds available. Apparently it was 'everyone have a baby all at once' week. They were to busy to get me in at the moment and said they would give me a call when things calmed down.
Jordon and I were beyond devastated. I cried all day just awaiting that phone call. At 4:00 pm they finally called! I was to be at the hospital by 6:00. I couldn't believe that we were actually going to have our baby!!

We got to the hospital and the nurse took us to our room to get us all settled. Our first nurse was very talkative.  First she was talking about tv shows and the actors she loves. Then somehow the subject got switched to Obama and how she likes him. Ohh noo. I kept looking over at Jordon trying to tell him with my eyes to just TRY and not get into a big argument. He made sure she knew how he felt about him without getting to crazy and everything was good. PHEW. She was an awesome nurse though and Jordon and I both really liked her.
My doctor and nurse that would be with me throughout the labor came in to check me and get things started. I was 3 cm dilated. Progress from my 2cm I was stuck at forever. We discussed about how I wanted to keep things as natural as possible. Apparently the doctor I had hasn't done many un-medicated births and kinda looked at me like I was a tad bit crazy. My nurse was awesome though. She told him that when I was dilated to a 4 or 5 she wanted to turn off the pitocin and possibly break my water so my body could keep progressing on its own and that way I could get in the bath tub to manage the pain. Then the doctor looked at the nurse like she was crazy. He told us he would only let me get in the tub if I promised I wouldn't deliver in the tub because that just weirded him out. The nurse told him to just leave and she had everything handled. It was hilarious. I loved that my nurse was willing to do everything she could so I could have the birth I wanted. It made things a lot easier.

They started the pitocin around 7pm and gradually increased it about every hour for 3 hours. I could feel the contractions but defiantly weren't painful. Jordon and I watched some TV and tried to get some sleep while we still could. At around 1am my nurse came in to see if I progressed any. I was still at a 3. So I slept some more and around 3am the contractions woke me up. My nurse gave me a birthing ball to sit on and work through the contractions. We turned on the music and Jordon sat on the edge of the bed while I bounced on the ball and held his hands. The contractions were starting to get intense and it was getting extremely hard to work through them. I do think the ball and the music helped a lot.
When I would read about other unmedicated birth stories I would always read about how they would hit this wall where they just wanted to give in. I defiantly hit that wall.

I started crying and telling Jordon that I didn't want to do this anymore and how I missed Ellie. Jordon was so amazing the whole time. I defiantly wouldn't have been able to do it without him. At 4am I gave in and asked them to come check my progress. I was soo terrified that I didn't progress any and wouldn't be able to get in the tub. The nurse checked me and said Holy cow you flew! Your already 7 cm!
She turned off the pitocin and started the tub. I had to wait 15 minutes before I could get in the tub to make sure I was still contracting on my own.

My contractions kept up and I was finally able to get in. INSTANT relief. I'm not even kidding you. It felt soo amazing. Jordon kept cracking up seeing how happy I was after I got in the tub.
I went from bawling my eyes out and being completely hysterical to laughing and joking around.
They turned off all the lights besides one and for the next hour or so I relaxed in the tub while Jordon sat beside it and continued holding my hand and putting cool washcloths on my forehead. It was perfect. The contractions were still painful of course but being in the tub made them so much more manageable. My nurse made me promise that when I started feeling like I needed to push that I would get out of the tub. I really didn't want to get out of the tub but when the urge to push became completely unbearable I finally gave in and got out. 

My nurse checked me and said I just had a little lip of cervix left but I would probably just push past it. My water still didn't break which helped with the pain of the contractions.
I hated being on the bed. It made everything so much worse.
I was super loud. hahahaha. Apparently there was a first time momma in the room next to me that could hear everything and I was totally freakin her out.
Sorry lady!

Pushing scared the hell out of me. It was by far the hardest part. I could feel EVERY THING. I just remember thinking oh my gosh I'm not going to be able to push this baby out and she is just going to be stuck there forever! So it took me a couple pushes to get myself to give it my all. While I was pushing only my nurse was in there because my doctor was delivering a baby at the same time. I told you it was have your babies all at once week. So the nurse thought for sure she would have to deliver this baby on her own. But he came in just in time. 
Ah pushing was seriously insane,  I started bawling every time I could feel a contraction starting cause I knew I would have to push again. Just thinking about it makes me want to start crying all over again and never ever ever have another baby. But of course I know that someday I will. Thankfully my nurse and my AMAZING husband were the best supporters ever in the world and helped me get through it. It felt like I was pushing forever but it was only about 15 minutes. 
The nurse kept saying she had so much dark hair and that was defiantly a motivator to push harder cause i defiantly didn't believe her. Then her head started coming out and I reached down to touch her, oh my goodness what a weird weird feeling. 
The doctor and the nurse said Nolah was moving around all over the place. She kept twisting side to side and totally trying to go back inside! Everyone was cracking up. Besides me of course. They said they have never seen a baby do that before. (Nolah really didn't want to come out and she fought it to the bitter end) Then on October 9th at 6:19am we finally got that little stinker out and they laid her on my tummy. She was absolutely perfect! and she really did have tons of dark hair! Jordon and I cried and cried. I can't even describe how amazing that moment was. 

Jordon got to cut the umbilical cord which totally shocked me cause he swore up and down he would never do that. It was all soo perfect. 
 *I got nice and shweaty*
They took Nolah to weigh her and clean her up a bit while they stitched me up. My doctor was saying I probably wouldn't have torn if I didn't get an episiotomy when I had Ellie. 

When they were weighing Nolah the nurse asked what our guesses were on how much she weighed. I said 7lbs and Jordon said 7lbs 6oz. The nurse started laughing, little did we know I just gave birth to a 9lb 2oz baby girl! We were shocked!
Everyone left us alone for awhile and let us spend sometime with our sweet new baby girl. I was still in shock that this little chubba just came out of me. 
 Jordon had another little girl steal his heart.
He said he watched everything and was so glad that he did.
He was so amazing throughout the entire thing.
I love him so much!
The nurse that helped me through the birth came in to say bye to us cause her shift was long over. She stayed later than she was suppose to to be there with me. After she left another nurse came in and told us we made facebook. haha She said our nurse posted on her profile how she just had the best delivery and this is why she loved her job. I thought it was so sweet of her. 
All the sweet stuff came to a pause for bit when the nurse came back in to check on my bleeding since I had a previous hemorrhage with Ellie. She started pushing on my stomach and blood gushed out everywhere. Yummy. I was starting to hemorrhage again. But thankfully they caught it soon enough and put me on pitocin to get my uterus contracting again. They also gave me a nice shot in the booty. The nurse had to keep coming back in to beat the crap out of me. Seriously I would much rather push a baby out again then have them push on your stomach like they do. I screamed every time she did it and I'm pretty sure I made her start crying cause she felt so bad. 
But they eventually got my bleeding under control. 
I still felt a million times better than I did when I had Ellie. I was able to get up and walk around on my own and I never got dizzy or light headed. 
We were able to leave the hospital the next day. I'm so amazed by how good I felt. I only had to take the ibuprofen a couple times. 
Comparing this birth and recovery to my first one they are complete opposites. The fact that with my first delivery I had a 6lb 9oz baby and had the hardest time recovering and my second was a 9lb 2oz baby and I feel amazing afterwards just proves to me that having an unmedicated birth is how my body was meant to give birth. 
I couldn't have asked for a better birth experience.
I feel so blessed that everything went so well. It was the perfect experience to share with Jordon before he left to Afghanistan. It brought us so much closer as a family. 
We were able to spend 5 short days together as a family before Jordon left on his deployment. 

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Nolah Laree Kinsman

She is finally here!
Nolah Laree Kinsman
October 9, 2011
at 6:19 am
9lbs 2oz
22 inches long

She is perfect.
Everything went amazing. I couldn't have asked for a better labor delivery and recovery.
We are absolutely in love with this girl.

Friday, October 7, 2011

The Finish Line

I have made it to 41 weeks! and I can't help but be completely depressed that I can say that. Yes I know its completely normal to go over your due date. I would be totally fine with going another week if my husband wasn't leaving next Friday. Every day that passes by without this baby coming out is a day less her dad gets to see her. Every time Jordon comes home from work he asks if anything is happening and every time I have to say no and I see his heart break a little each time. It absolutely kills me.

I have not dilated any more since my 36 week appointment. Although I have thinned out more and her head has moved down more. I have had my membranes stripped 4 times. I haven't had anything that feels like contractions in over 2 weeks. I have tried just about everything you can think of to get labor going. So I have had to give in and schedule an induction date. They scheduled me to go in tomorrow, but my doctor said they have been completely swamped and there is very little chance that they will be able to get me in unless I go into labor on my own of course. I'm really upset that I have to be induced. I know lots of people have it done but I just don't feel comfortable with it.
This pregnancy just hasn't gone at all how I was hoping.
41 weeks of pregnancy sure does make your emotions a little crazy.
Last night Jordon and I had a nice long talk about everything and he gave me a blessing and I defiantly think it helped me come to terms with everything. Everything happens for a reason and I know I need to accept the things I cannot control. This baby girl will come into this world when and how she was meant to. Hey I could still go into labor tonight who knows!
40 weeks 5 days
We have everything ready. Our bags are packed, laundry is all done, house cleaned, and I even made some freezer dinners. I'm so proud of myself. Now hopefully the clean house and laundry will last until we go to the hospital.

The 5th was Jordon and I's 4 year anniversary! We didn't do anything special, just went to a pretty depressing doctor's appointment. But we went on a nice long walk and just spent some time together and that was enough for me. I love that ridiculously handsome man. He is such an amazing husband/father/person. He has grown more this past year than he has since I have known him. I think we both have. I can't exactly say I'm looking forward to the year ahead of us but I love the way our life together is turning out. I know this coming year will be one of the hardest if not THE hardest year for us but I know we will come out of this stronger and closer than before. I am married to the man of my dreams and I will do whatever I need to to show him that I will always be there for him.
I love you Jordon!!

Friday, September 30, 2011

Happy Due Date! :S

ah Yes, today is my 'due' date. No baby. I chose not to be induced until after 41 weeks. Like I said before I really don't want to be induced. I'm still dilated to a 2. At my 40 week appointment they said my cervix is a lot more softer and starting to move forward. I didn't know it did that? Also baby's head is even lower and my doctor said that when she does decide to come she should come pretty fast. I'm hanging on to that hope. OH p.s I have had my membranes stripped 3 times.. Yeah if your baby isn't ready to come your baby ISN'T going to come.


I cry at the drop of a hat. Not just because I'm very pregnant and very miserable, but also because everything that is going on is really sinking in and reality is hitting me hard and all these crazy hormones sure aren't helping.
My husband is leaving soon. We wont be together again for a whole year.. Yes there is R and R but does 2 weeks really compare to the amount of the time that he is gone?? I have been stressing big time about how Ellie will handle everything. I pray that I will be able to keep her somewhat busy. It wont matter how busy she is she will always want her daddy but hopefully it will make things a little easier for her.

Our anniversary is on the 5th. 4 years baby! A new baby would be the PERFECT anniversary present. Although it would be an even better present if she came before that and we are able to be home for our anniversary and not at a hospital. But ya know beggars can't be choosers.

I've been getting a little teary eyed that Ellie isn't going to be our baby anymore. I think Jordon has been having a hard time about it too. One night after Ellie was asleep Jordon kept going in Ellie's room and checking on her. Then he came in our room and asked, "Can Ellie come sleep in our bed? I need some Ellie time." It was the stinkin cutest thing ever. Jordon is a major anti-kids sleeping in our bed. But he went and woke her up and put her in our bed so they could get some snuggles in. I love seeing him be a dad. It is my most favorite thing in the whole world.

No belly pics for now... Im not really feeling it at the moment. But don't worry I will get one so everyone can tell me just how ginormous I am. Ha.
Keep sending those good vibes that this baby will come soon!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Did The Baby Pop Out Yet??


Someday maybe.

Had my 38 week appointment last Friday. I was suppose to have it on Thursday but my husband forgot about it and never came home from work and wouldn't answer his phone. Yeah can you even imagine how furious I was?! I was bawling my freakin eyes out. A little over the top? Yeah. But I'm pregnant..
Luckily the Doctor's office was able to squeeze me in the next day. I think the lady felt bad cause I was totally crying over the phone.
Good stuff.
Well here's the goods from my doctors appointment. 2cm dilated.  PROGRESS! I was only 2cm when I went into labor with Ellie. About 60% effaced. Cervix is nice and soft and everything looks ready to go.(According to my doctor) Had my membranes stripped. Thought I was going to cry it hurt so bad. Apparently my cervix is all the way in the back so it was hard for her to really get in there!! But oh she did.. I thought for sure after going through that I would at least deserve to go into labor that weekend. No luck. I was contracting all day Friday and I made sure I walked around a ton and all that good stuff to keep them going but nighttime came around and everything completely stopped. My mind was going a million miles a minute and I had so much energy for some reason and I could not get to sleep that night. I didn't fall asleep until 6 in the morning. It was fabulous.
Ellie giving her sister loves, and trying to convince her to come out.
Jordon finally got his official orders for deployment. lame. But good news is he isn't leaving right after my due date like we thought. He will have an extra week or two if this babes decides to come on time. Its nice to finally have a date to help prepare myself. It also makes me sick to my stomach every time I think about it so thats cool.
I'm so anxious to get this baby out so Jordon can have as much time as possible with her but apparently its up to her. whateve.
Nothing fits anymore, not even my maternity shirts.
We have just about everything ready for this baby sooo she should just COME OUT ALREADY! If everyone could just send me some good vibes that she will come soon that would be great. Other than really wanting her out I have been feeling pretty decent. Although me and Ellie got a nice little cold today.  Hopefully it will go away soon.
In other news our nice and quiet upstairs neighbors moved. :( I'm very nervous to see who moves in next. Hopefully someone quiet because with a new baby I wont be holding my complaints back.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

The New Big Sis

I have been wanting to do something for Ellie when I have the baby. Just a little something that we can give her when she meets her new baby sis. Something to help celebrate her becoming a big sister. Also so she wont feel left out with the attention of the new baby.
But I just don't know what I should do.. I have thought about making Ellie and Nolah little matching bracelets and big sis lil sis shirts, but not sure if that will get done before the babes comes.
So if anyone has any super cute ideas to share I'm all ears!

Sunday, September 4, 2011


It's September!!!!!
That means that sometime this month we will have a new baby girl in our lil fam!
I had my ultrasound and doc appointment this past week.
The ultrasound was so fun and made me super excited for her to come.
The babes is surely a girl, and she is very very wiggley. 
The ultrasound tech was cracking up about how wiggley she was. 
It was hard to get a really good profile of her face but when we finally did she had her hands up by her eyes and it made her look like she was rubbin her eyes.
So cute.
Either she has the best pouty face ever or this baby girl has some gigantic lips.
I can't wait to see what she looks like.
She is measuring perfectly. The doc said she is measuring in the 58%.
She asked how big Ellie was when she was born and said that she defiantly thinks this baby will be bigger! Ellie was 6lbs 9oz.

 35 weeks
I am 1cm dilated and doc said her head is really really low.
I was super excited to hear that her head was low because every time someone would check me with Ellie the first thing they would say was HOLY COW her head is WAAAY up in there. Ellie defiantly made me do all the work.
So I'm crossing my fingers that this will make my labor a lot faster!
At my 38 week appointment they are going to strip my membranes, hopefully it will work like magic and put me into labor.
I can't believe we are so close!
I defiantly don't have everything ready and probably should get on that..
I want her to be here already but I don't. 
I'm getting nervous!
I love my gigantic belly even though its making life miserable. 
Jordon isn't even nervous at all.
It kinda makes me wanna punch him.
He said as long as I have the baby in the hospital he is fine and dandy.

 36 weeks

4 more weeks to go!

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

35 weeks

Not much longer to go!
I can't believe how fast this pregnancy flew by. Its insane.
I had a doctors appointment a week or so ago. (oh btw I passed my kidney stone 2 weeks ago. HALLELUJAH. Instant pain relief. Nolah started freaking out right on my bladder and no matter what I did she would not stop, so I thought maybe if I tried to go potty that would get her to stop. Out went my kidney stone. I give the credit to Nolah for beating the stone out of me.)
Doctor said everything is so far so good. We talked about Jordon leaving right around my due date and they said that if I haven't had the baby by 39-40 weeks they will induce me. I really really REALLY do not want to be induced, but I just can't handle the thought of Jordon just barely missing the birth of his baby. Hopefully the babes will decided to come just a wee bit early. Apparently I'm measuring small. HA HA! I'm only measuring at 30 weeks instead of 34 (at the time of the appointment) My doctor said the baby defiantly doesn't feel small but we will just say she does so I can get another ultrasound. Which I'm totally fine with of course! :) So I have my ultrasound today, I'm pretty excited. Then later this week I have my 36 week appointment. Gosh so crazy.
Now that I am no longer in pain from my kidney I'm just in pain from pregnancy. My legs have started to go numb. It is hard work to try and get sleep. My belly is so HEAVY! and It seriously feels like my belly button is going to rip open. It burns so bad. Started getting stretch marks :( dang. But they still are really light so hopefully they will fade after I have the baby. I'm crossing my fingers. I have contractions ALL THE TIME. And they aren't little ones either. They take the breath out of me every now and then. As much as I wish I could just be done with this pregnancy at the moment I really do not want her to come to early. Pregnancy is crazy but I love it.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

During all this craziness that has been happening lately it has become very apparent that we have some of the most amazing people in our lives right now.
When Jordon took me to the hospital it was getting late at night, and we had to find someone that could watch Ellie.
Our amazing friends Brettin and Doug gladly took her for the night, and when we found out I would be staying longer than expected they took her without hesitation.
It was such a relief knowing that Ellie was in good hands while we hit our rough spot.
While I had my little stay at the hospital another one of our friends that Jordon works with came and brought me flowers from everyone in Jordon's platoon. I thought that was the sweetest thing ever to know that they were thinking of us. I started bawling.
Then to top it all off Brettin threw us a baby shower. People in Jordon's platoon pitched in money to buy us things they knew we needed for the baby. We got pretty stinkin spoiled.
When we moved here I was so worried about all the little things that could possibly happen where we would need to lean on some one else to help us out. I defiantly don't worry about that now.
We are so blessed to have these amazing people in our lives.
As much as I hate Jordon being in the Army, all the people that it has brought into our lives defiantly makes up for it. Any of the other jobs that Jordon has had defiantly wouldn't have taken the time to bring flowers to his wife while in the hospital, and defiantly wouldn't help throw a baby shower for us.
Jordon defiantly got lucky with the company he was put in. They are all so close and it defiantly makes me feel better about him leaving to Afghanistan with them.
I am so so so grateful, I just can't say it enough.

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Well about two weeks ago I was counting my blessings about how much I was enjoying my pregnancy and how sad I was going to be when it is over. Fast forward to last Tuesday and I noticed a lot of blood in my pee. I wasn't in pain or anything but it defiantly worried me, so first thing Wednesday morning I called my doctor's office and they had me go into the clinic to take a pee test. As soon as I got home from taking the test I had the most excruciating pain in my back. I could barely even move. By the time Jordon came home from work the pain was so bad it felt like I couldn't even breath. I started puking from the pain. I kept calling the doctor's office and they said since I had a doctor's appointment the next day I should just wait it out. I tried my hardest and lasted till about 9 at night and gave in and called the emergency number I had and they gave me the go ahead to come on in to labor and delivery.
They said that it looked like I had a kidney stone but wasn't showing any sign of an infection. They monitored baby N's heartbeat and she was as happy as can be. Thank goodness. They gave me some morphine for the pain and I could finally breathe again. After a while they noticed I was contracting a bit and decided to keep me over night. Everything eventually calmed down though. The next day they gave me an ultrasound of my kidneys. Lamest ultrasound ever. Not only did they not even look at the babes they had the screen turned away from me so I couldn't see anything, so I slept the entire time.
They said they could defiantly see that something was going on with my kidney but couldn't see a stone but said that was normal. :/
So after staying another night to see if I would pass a stone and to get my pain under control they sent me home. Apparently when your pregnant and have a kidney stone you just get to play the waiting game. The only thing they can do to help you is manage the pain. Its been a week now and nothing has changed. I'm still in the worse freakin pain. All I do is sit on the couch and sleep and cry.  Its totally lame. Who knows how long this stupid thing is going to last but I'm sooooo over it. We have about a million bajillion things going on right now and I can't get anything done.
Seriously, never get a kidney stone. Worse pain ever. No joke. But I am so very thankful that Nolah is doing perfectly fine.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Stylish Girl

Ellie is seriously the funnest to hang out with.(when she isn't talking back) Last weekend we went to the county fair. It was Ellie's first time going to anything like that so she was pretty stinkin' excited to go on all the rides. I of course couldn't go on any rides but I think I had just as much fun if not more watching her and her Daddy go on the rides. Jordon talked Ellie into going on one of the more scary rides. (ya know the one that looks like a big ship and goes back and forth really high??) At first Ellie was enjoying herself until the ride started getting really high and making her tummy do flip flops and then she started freaking out a bit. Oh my goodness she had the saddest face. I was dying. I was seriously tempted to tell the guy to stop the ride, it was breaking my heart. But she survived. Phew.
Then Ellie and I had to get our faces painted. Ellie had to get the one with the blue lips. We tried talking her out of it but she would not change her mind. It was so cute watching her get her face painted. She just sat there and let the lady do her thing. I could tell it was killing Jordon. He is anti anything that looks like make-up. hahha He is going to be so fun when she is a teenager. The lady that was painting Ellie's face couldn't get enough of Ellie. They even got a picture of her for their portfolio thing. Everyone kept telling Ellie how cute she looked and Ellie ATE IT UP. She would just stand there with a shy smile putting her head to her shoulder. She made Jordon take a million pictures of her so she could keep looking at them.
She was non-stop at the fair. She wanted to do anything and everything and since she was being so dang cute we pretty much let her. We stayed at the fair until midnight. Ellie is a party animal.
That's the downside of when she is being so cute and fun we can't say no to her. (Especially Jordon)
She makes me soo excited to have another girl. I love her guts and I hope her sister is exactly like her. (besides when she is a smart mouth..)

Friday, July 15, 2011

MaMa's Milk

I am bound and determined to breastfeed Nolah.
It didn't work out very well if Ellie, and I defiantly regret not trying harder.
I'm sad that we didn't get that bonding time.
First off I had no idea what I was doing when attempting to breastfeed Ellie.
 Honestly when I would breastfeed it was the most painful thing ever,
and I was already having a way hard time with recovering from the delivery that I threw in the towel after 2 weeks of trying.
But now I am (hopefully) a lot more educated on the subject.
But I could still use some pointers. So any breastfeeding mama's if you have any tips or tricks or products that saved you please fill me in!
I am now 29 weeks pregnant!
11 more to go.
I filled out my pre-registration papers for the hospital..
It freaked me out a bit, not gonna lie..
Nolah is growing like crazy and I have gained 14 lbs so far.
Everything is looking good so far.
Besides the no sleep and being extremely grumpy.
My Doctor prescribed me some heartburn medicine and it has saved my life.
But really for the most part I have enjoyed being pregnant.
Ellie is getting really impatient though. Everyday she asks me if I'm having the baby today.
I'm so excited to see her be a big sister!
 Nolah now has a deadline of when she needs to come if she wants to meet her daddy!
Hopefully she will make it. Fingers crossed.
Can I just say that so far my husband being in the military gets a big fat thumbs down!

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Ellie Talk 101

Ellie makes up the funniest words. I love it, I always get so sad when she starts to say the right word for things instead of saying one of her made up words. Here are just a few.
My favorite would have to be 'skellup' which she says for skeleton. It sounds even better when she says it in her cute voice.
Instead of bleeding she will say blooding. "Ah mom I'm blooding! I'm blooding all over! Hurry get me a band-aid." I'll check on her and she will have a tiny red scratch.. no blooding. Drama Queen.
Zippers are zits/pimples. She loves pointing out the zippers on my face.
Freckers are freckles. We try not to say that one cause when she says it, it sometimes sounds like a different word... :/
Jordon's sunburn was peeling and Ellie called it Cricky skin.
She makes up words all the time, I need to remember to write them down. These are just her regulars. 

Thursday, July 7, 2011


Well I took a grand total of ZERO pictures while we were in Utah. I know Jordon's mom got some so I will have to try and steal some from her.
I have been terrible at taking pictures lately.
Anyways our trip to Utah was fun. A lot of things didn't go according to plan but ya know whateve. Do they ever? It was nice seeing everyone for 5 seconds. It went by so fast.
Ellie was non stop the entire time. She would go to bed around 10 pm (midnight our time) and wake up around 7 am (5 am our time) and just go go go all day. She defiantly got her play time in. She was grumpy beyond belief but if we just let her go play with cousins she was fine and dandy. It was when we told her she needed to eat or drink something she would fall apart.
I'm sad to say that the only places I checked off my food list was Cafe Rio and Chicken Express. I'm a little upset about it I'm not going to lie.
A week is defiantly not long enough to visit with everyone. But I hope Jordon was able to get his fill of family before he deploys.
It was a good practice trip so we know how to deal with things better for next time!
The plane ride home was a killer. All night flight. With 2 layovers one being 3 hours in between flights. Not to mention airplane seats are sooo not comfortable even if your not pregnant. SO I got zero sleep. Ellie slept the whole way on one of the plane rides but when she woke up she was screaming bloody murder because her ears needed to pop. Poor thing, broke my heart. But I'm sure everyone else on the plane loved the alarm clock!
  Me and Ellie made up for  the crappy nights sleep the next morning by sleeping in until 12 in the afternoon.
I sure do miss everyone!!!

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

and Breathe

Crazy lil' tidbit: I was this far along in my pregnancy with Ellie when we finally told our parents.
I defiantly wouldn't have been able to hide this pregnancy!

Time is going by too fast.
I was really banking on this pregnancy making time go by nice and slow.
September seems right around the corner.
The sooner this baby gets here the sooner Jordon deploys.
So I'm perfectly fine with time crawling by.
Jordon's company is deploying in late September.
Good news is that since that is when I'm due Jordon will be a late deployer. 
He will get at least 10 days with us after Nolah is born. Hopefully.
They haven't given us any details yet and probably wont until.. September.
But I have been trying super hard to not even think about it.
I have defiantly accepted that this is how it has to be and there is no use letting
it ruin the time we do have together.

So the hospital I'm suppose to deliver at defiantly doesn't have a good reputation. I was talking to my midwife at my last appointment just asking her about my options about delivery.
I told her I wanted everything as natural as possible and didn't want to have to stay in the bed or anything like that. She told me that I would be allowed to move around as much as I wanted and that they have jacuzzi tubs in some birth rooms. She told me that I would be left alone as much as I wanted.
So I was feeling pretty good about everything.
I started doing some research about the hospital because ever since we moved here I heard not so good things about it. I found a whole bunch of ratings about the hospital and none of them were good. All of them talked about how terrible the nurses were, especially in labor and delivery. 
Our friend told us a story of their friend that went there to get a cyst removed and ended up with staph infection from the hospital and basically cutting all his stinkin skin off his arm to try and get rid of the infection.
Yeah... not really wanting to have my baby there. At all.
I have searched and searched for any birth centers or anything like that near by and can't find anything.
The only hospital I have heard good things about is the Syracuse hospital and that is an hour and a half drive. Gahh! I don't know what to do!
I have tried to convince Jordon into letting me have the baby at home and he can just deliver Nolah but he isn't really feelin that. hahaha
I'm starting to get nervous about giving birth. I'm not scared of the pain or anything I just know that I have way to high of expectations of how I want everything to happen since it will be the last big event before Jordon leaves for a year, so I'm just scared that it will go nothing like I'm hoping.
And going to a crappy hospital that no one has anything good to say about, I'm sure will put a damper on things.
I need some advice people.
I don't know anyone that has given birth here. 
Goodness. I'm trying not to worry about it so much but we do have a time limit here!
1 more week till we go to Utah. Hopefully that will help me relax and figure things out better.

Monday, June 13, 2011

Happy Times

 Jordon has been dreaming of being an awesome fisherman since we moved here. So as soon as the weather started warming up we picked him up a fishing pole and got him a fishing license.
Our first attempt at fishing was a sad day. Apparently we have no idea what we are doing. We were in an area that had quite a bit of people around. About every five minutes someone was pulling out a fish and not just baby fish, HUGE stinkin fish. One guy caught a fish, I kid you not, the size of Ellie. Jordon was feelin' good about this spot because obviously there was no shortage of fish. We try for a good two hours, with a total catch of 0 fish. Jordon was devastated.
We gave fishing another go this past weekend. Jordon tried to work his magic for about an hour with only nibbles. I asked him if I could give it a try and as soon as I put my line in the water I caught a fish. Jordon was furious. hahahhaha poor guy I felt so bad.
He gave it another go with no such success while I went off with Ellie for a bit. I joined him again, picked up a fishing pole, put out my line, and caught another fish.
Jordon was livid and said, "I'm not even helping you get the fish off that line. You have to do it all by yourself." I whined and told him I didn't know how to do it and was to much of a baby to touch the fish. He replied, "I don't even care, if your going to be catching stupid fish all the time you need to learn to do it on your own."
So my stinky husband made me take the hook out of the fishes mouth and put him back in the water all by myself.
We fished for awhile longer and FINALLY Jordon's curse was broken and he caught his very own fish. He was so proud of himself. But through the day he kept informing me he was still mad at me for beating him at fishing.
hahaha I love that cutie butt.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011


For Memorial weekend we took a little trip to Palmyra since it's only two hours away. We went to the Joseph Smith house and The Sacred Grove. Seriously the most gorgeous place. Everyone should go visit, best experience ever.
The Sacred Grove was exactly how I always pictured it.

I can't wait to go there again and again and again!
I would have gotten a lot more pictures but allergies decided to attack my face. I have never gotten real allergies before. Every once in awhile in the spring time my nose would get runny for a couple days but that was it. This time I was coughing, sneezing, nose running like a faucet, and my eyes were watering like there was no tomorrow. But I still had a lot of fun. Hopefully next time that wont happen so we can spend more time there.


I'm pretty sure I'm standing retarded in this picture cause I swear my belly really looks twice this size.
Had a doctor's appointment yesterday to talk about my ultrasound.
Nolah looks perfect!
Gained 7lbs from my last doctor's appointment... That's rad :/
Seriously this gal is not wasting any time getting HUGE!
Finally got some maternity clothes. Sooo much more comfortable. But of course they didn't have any capri's in my size. Anyone know of anywhere that sales maternity bermuda shorts or anything like that in xs?

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Baby Nolah

We are officially past the half-way mark of meeting this gal.
I think we finally picked a name too!!
I really didn't think we would have a name picked out until the day she was born.
But I made it my mission to look up pretty much every name there is and find one that Jordon and I both can agree on.
Nolah Laree Kinsman
I love love love it!
Jordon really likes it too so hopefully this name will stick.
Ellie says anilla, like vanilla without the v.
I don't really know why cause she will say Nolah sometimes.
But whatever works!

Baby Nolah FREAKS whenever I put something on my belly. She will keep hitting it until I move it off.
I can only wear my pre-pregnancy jeans with my belly bands. If I try to suck it in and button them Oh no Nolah will not have it.
It's pretty hilarious really. Sometimes I will purposely set something on my belly just to watch her freak. Jordon thinks I'm the meanest person ever.
I'm not putting anything heavy on my belly I will just set my phone on it and she will start kicking away.

I LOVE all the delicious 'summer' type foods we eat now.
We just bought a grill and grilled up some amazing turkey burgers and veggies and my belly is HAPPY.
Don't even get me started on watermelon.. Ahhh best thing ever.
I have been feeling sooo much better. I have energy now and haven't thrown up in awhile.
My only complaint is terrible lower back pain and crazy heartburn.
I love having my energy back. Our house is gradually getting clean again.
I'm also starting to get a little craft itch too.
Hopefully I can get some cute ideas for Ellie and Nolah.
That pretty much sums up the pregnancy so far.
Keep me outside in the sunshine and delicious food in my belly and I see one happy pregnancy ahead of me. :):):)

Friday, May 13, 2011

House Full

Obviously I have terrible instincts!

I should have known Miss Ellie would get her wish.
Yes we are expecting a baby GIRL!

This little gal in my tummy is a STINKER!
While at my ultrasound she had her leggies squeezed shut!
She was not going to let anyone see her bizz.
The tech had me lay about a billion different ways to try and get a view.
Then the tech finally gets a picture of what this babe is trying to hide and the tech tells us,
"I'm not allowed to tell you whether its a boy or girl I can only show you the picture."
Oh man I almost started cussin' up a storm.
I told her, "No your kidding. Just tell us."
 She proceeded to tell us that if she told us what the sex was she would get in trouble.
At this point I was basically shaking I was so FURIOUS!
She could tell us what every body part this baby had but she wasn't allowed to tell us if the baby had a penis of vagina?!!!!?
Pretty much dumbest thing I have ever heard in my life.
Then she informed us that they use either a circle or an arrow to tell you if its a boy or girl.
She said our symbol was a circle.  WHAT THE EFF DOES THAT MEAN?!?!?!
She wasn't 'allowed' to tell us which symbol was which.
So we left the stupid ultra sound office livid. 
Then we decided to call my doctor's office to see if they would tell us what the symbol meant.
And Hallelujah they told us.
The little circle confirmed we are having a baby girl!
Look at how ridiculously cute she is already!
When we told Ellie she was going to get her baby sister she did her high pitched squeal then told us how she was going to dress her up like a ballerina and teach her how to dance and do her hair all the time.
She is basically pretty excited. 
I'm super excited to see them be all sisterly. 
Now we can finally start getting things ready.
She will have plenty of clothes, so all we need to worry about getting is EVERYTHING else. 
All the stuff we had for Ellie was either borrowed or we traded it in for her big girl stuff at consignment stores.
I don't know how Jordon feels about having a house full of girls!
All I can say is he better get use to booby talk and lil panties everywhere. 
I think he is a little nervous because he knows he is such a pushover when it comes to his girls and now we are adding another to the bunch.
He does so good with Ellie so I'm not worried. 
He was meant to have a house full of baby girls!
We don't have any names picked out. I don't know if we ever will. Jordon and I cannot for the life of us agree on any girl names. 
I'm excited to add more pink to this house and I'm totally going to dress her and Ellie in matching outfits!
hahaha LOVE IT.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Tomorrow is our ultrasound! 
All I can say is that this wee lil' baby better not be shy or I am camping out in that chair until we find out whether we are having a boy or girl. 
I'm feeling that it's a boy. So its probably a girl. Ha Ha But I'm going to say it's a boy and see if my instincts are right. It's all just for fun and games of course. 

I'm beyond excited for the ultrasound but so nervous! When I had my ultrasound with Ellie they discovered her kidneys were dilated. The doctor told me all the risks of dilated kidneys. First he said it could be a sign of downs syndrome and might need an amniocentesis. I was also told that if it doesn't fix itself by the time she is born then she would have to have surgery, and in extreme cases the kidneys could burst and I would lose the baby. I had to get another ultrasound at LDS hospital to see how severe it was. It ended up being a very mild case and they told me that in a most cases the problem always fixes itself by birth. I think every pregnant momma worries about potential problems but after I had that ultrasound I became sick to my stomach with the realization that there was a good possibility that my baby wouldn't be healthy.  Of course it all turned out OK and Ellie has never had any health issues, and we are so extremely grateful for that.
So that experience defiantly makes me nervous to have this ultrasound. But I'm thinking positive and know that no matter what happens it is all part of Heavenly Father's plan.

I can't wait to start getting things ready for this little kidlet! I don't even bother looking at stuff since we don't know what we are having yet. I am one of those people that if we are having a girl EVERYTHING has to be extra girly and if its a boy EVERYTHING has to be extra boyish!

In other exciting news we are coming to Utah June 22-30. I'm excited to see all our fam! Especially my baby nephew Taetum that I haven't met yet! Also my bro in-law Kolten just came home from his mission so that will be exciting for him to see how crazy big his niece Ellie is now! I'm sad we only get to be there a week and I PRAY we will be able to get enough time with both families. Ugh I miss being with family! 
Don't get me wrong I defiantly think there are ups to living a ways away from family, but I wish it wasn't SO far away. I think us living away from family has made Jordon and I's marriage a lot stronger. We constantly argued about family in Utah and now we pretty much never argue, so that's nice. Also my daughter actually somewhat listens to me now that she doesn't have 5 million other people to tell her yes when mom said no. 
But dangit I just miss the feeling of being near family. I miss the Sunday family visits. I miss knowing that if your ever having some trouble you had a long list of people more than willing to help. :(
Lately I have been throwing myself a little pity party that I don't get to celebrate this pregnancy with my family around.
You can never have it all can you?

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Living Room

Our living room finally looks like someone actually lives in it. It is still a work in progress, but so far I'm likin' it. Our living room is really long and skinny so we actually only have half of our living room mostly finished. We kind of seperated them into two rooms. There is our little TV section and then the other half will be the office/play area. There is still a lot to do with the office/play area so I didn't take any pictures of that part.
These pictures are terrible so I apologize in advance.
 Jordon's pride and joy. Ever since before we got married Jordon has wanted a flat screen TV, he finally got one.
Our couch that we finally decided on after searching for 4 long months.
Ignore the rocking chair. We had no where else to put it. I'm not really digging how we set up our pictures on this wall...

Our DVD case that I love.
Before Jordon and I had a place we could decorate I was always so excited to be able to decorate our home together. We like a lot of the same things so I figured it would be a piece of cake. Oh man was I wrong. It took us forever to agree on anything. For instance that DANG couch. We could not agree on a couch at all. Then Jordon found the couch that we have now and I totally gave in and let him get it. I love it now, but I didn't love the price tag so I really didn't want to get it but man o man I was so done looking.
I defiantly think our living room needs some more color, but Jordon isn't big on bright colors.. *sigh
Sometimes I wish he wasn't so into this stuff...
I really really want to get some curtains for the living room. I love curtains for some reason. But I have not been able to find any that I like. I saw on one of these crafty blogs I read that they just got plain white curtains and painted a stencil on them. It turned out really cute so I think I'm going to try and do something like that.  I think the rest of our house decorating will go on hold until after we get all the stuff we need for the baby, which is basically everything so it will probably be a while. We also might try and move into a bigger apartment which I'm really not looking forward to because I really like the layout of this apartment, but it will defiantly be a lil snug in here with 2 kids. We will see what happens..

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

No One Messes with Ellie's Daddy

First things first, I am so PROUD of my amazing husband for getting a promotion today!! He has worked his butt off and more than deserves it. I would brag about all the details of just how awesome he is but I still don't understand all the military lingo and I don't want to cancel out all the awesome stuff with my stupidity.

When Jordon came home from work he was telling me about how they dumped water on him when he got his promotion. Ellie was listening and became upset. "Dad why did they do that to you?!" Jordon tried to explain that they were just being silly and it was all fun in games, but Ellie was not having it. In her most serious 'I mean business' voice she explained to us just how unacceptable this was. "They DO NOT throw water on  MY  DADDY! You better take me to you work so I can tell them that it is NOT OK for them to throw water on my dad. And if they try to throw water on you again I will say HEY STOP RIGHT THERE!" 
I wish more than anything we got this on tape because it was the  most hilarious thing I have ever heard. I started to laugh a bit and Ellie looked at me with her arms crossed and said, "Mom this is not a joke! This is very serious." 
Ah I wish my pregnancy brain didn't erase everything right after it happened and I could write this little convo word for word cause she went on for some time telling us how everyone at daddy's work was in big trouble.
I think the funniest thing was just picturing this little 3 year old girl telling a bunch of soldiers what was up, and of course in true Ellie fashion she would have one hand on her hip the whole time.

So if anyone is thinking about messing with Ellie's dad you better be prepared to take on Ellie, because that kind of shenanigans WILL NOT be tolerated. 

Monday, May 2, 2011

Layin Low

10 more days till we have our ultrasound! Yipee!
Baby love has been moving all over the place. Jordon was able to feel it for the first time on Friday. Jordon put his hand on my belly and the babes immediately pushed up against his hand and started rubbing back and forth. That was the hardest I have ever felt the baby move so far. Just wanted to make sure Daddy knew the babes loves his guts already.
It feels like this kid is trying to escape already. He will move down as low as possible and roll around. It feels like if it kicks the wrong spot there is going to be an arm or a leg hanging out. Yeah its pretty uncomfortable.

Ellie was watching Tangled and I walked in on her trying to kiss Flynn Ryder on the TV. She didn't even try to deny it. She was rather proud.
Stinkin crazy kid of mine. I love her to much.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Sunshine Makes Me Happy

Yesterday was 78 degrees! It felt delicious outside. So of course Ellie and I spent the entire day outside. The best thing about living on base is there are tons and tons of playgrounds. There are 3 playgrounds just a short walk away from our house.
 I must say it is the funnest thing to listen to the things little kids talk about to each other. There was a little girl about Ellie's age playing and I heard her say, "I have FOUR boyfriends!" I was like PHEW it's not just Ellie that says that crazy stuff.
 It is so nice to watch her play with other kids. She isn't shy at all. She will run up to any other kids that are playing at the same place and put her hand on her hip and say, "You can play with me if you want!"
When Jordon got off work we went to another playground. At first Jordon was playing with her and then Ellie started playing with the other kids and Jordon kind of got pushed aside. haha. He was OK with it though, I think. She was playing with a bunch of kids that were probably a couple years older than her but she was defiantly holding her own and able to keep up with them pretty well. Jordon and I just sat back and watched her be such a big kid. It was bittersweet. I think it really hit us that she isn't a little baby that needs our help with everything all the time. We kept saying stuff to her and just watching her and smiling and when she would walk past us she would say, "Stop staring at me!" with one of those 'gosh my parents are so embarrassing' looks on her face. It was hilarious.
Ellie is such a fun gal, I love hanging out with her all the time. Sometimes I get a little sad that its not going to be just me and her all the time for much longer. I'm defiantly savoring these last months we have alone together. I also love that it is finally getting warmer! I'm not going to lie winter totally sucked big time here but there are tons and tons of things to do here in the summer time. We will defiantly be spending a lot of time outside. Yesterday after spending so much time outside I felt TONS better. Maybe that is the cure this baby was looking for!

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Boys Have Cooties!

My 3 year old has become obsessed with boyfriends! I think she has cut 10 years off of Jordon and I's life expectancy.
Every time she watches a TV show with a boy in it or sees a little boy about her age she always says, "That's my boyfriend. We hold hands all the time."
It's basically all she talks about now a days. Her top pick for a boyfriend currently is Flynn Ryder from Tangled. I was being a brat one day and told her that me and Flynn Ryder were boyfriend girlfriend and we totally hold hands all the time. Oh man she freaked. It was hilarious.
After my doctor's appointment we went to Wendy's for lunch and we were sitting there chatting and Ellie says, "Ah Dad I really need to get myself a boyfriend." Jordon replied with, "I will never let you have a boyfriend."
Poor Jordon. If Ellie ever talks about getting boobs or having boyfriends Jordon turns about 10 shades whiter.
I told Ellie that she has to tell me whenever she gets a boyfriend. She replied, "Yeah I will even tell you when we kiss!" Jordon basically almost died.
I've tried telling her that boys have cooties and they are totally gross and she is just like, "I LOVE COOTIES!"
She is growing up way to fast for my liking. I think we will keep her locked up till she is 18. Yeah, I think that will be the plan.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

So here are my belly pictures for now. I'm actually 16 weeks now but I don't think my tummy looks any different than 14 weeks. Sorry the pictures are kinda blurry they are cell phone pictures, but that's probably as good as they are gonna get from me. 
I have been feeling lil' baby kicks for a couple weeks now. I thought it was way to early to feel kicks and I didn't want to be all mushy gooshy about gas bubbles! But I can defiantly tell a difference now. I don't feel them very often but I have been able to tell that they are gradually getting stronger! I'm still getting sick. LAME. I have zero appetite. I have to force myself to eat, which is totally unlike me cause eating is my most favoritest thing to do!  If I do crave something it will be something I know I can't have like Cafe Rio and Carl's Jr. Yes there is no Carl's Jr. or the other name it goes by in other states I can't remember what it is I think its Hardees or something. I have been dying for a big juicy guacamole burger. In fact I have not found any decent burger places here in NY and I must say I'm deeply upset.  My search will still continue though. 
Its dumb cause I constantly think about food but when it comes to eating I don't want to. 
I don't even understand.
Hopefully this will soon change and I will want to eat anything and everything.
I miss Utah food. All they have here are pizza places and Italian places. The two freakin foods I absolutely cannot stand right now. It's so unfair.
We are suppose to make a trip to Utah in June hopefully and you better believe I'm going to shove my face with food the entire time. My list consists of: Carl's Jr. guacamole burger and jalapeno chicken burger, Cafe Rio salad of course *this will most likely be a daily meal, Chicken Express mmmm best food ever, and Thai House Spicy Noodles. Those are just places right off the top of my head.. 
 I have been thinking more about the food then visiting my family. 
I'M PREGNANT OK! Don't judge me.
That has actually become my excuse for everything lately. Its awesome
4 more weeks and we are halfway done! This totally freaks me out. 
I feel so unprepared and feel like I have no time.
I don't want this pregnancy to go by fast.
I'm sure it will start to feel like it's crawling by soon but right now, gosh it feels like we just found out yesterday.
We should find out what we are having soon! I am super excited to find out. I could never go without finding out. Ellie still says it's a girl, Jordon says it's a boy, I'm undecided. I have been mostly feeling like its a boy but lately I have been thinking girl so I have absolutely no idea. I would love to have a boy so we could have one of each but I would love to give Ellie a sister. I'm super close with my sisters so I defiantly want Ellie to be able to have that type of relationship too.
But I don't know I can't decide. What do you guys think? Boy or Girl?
We have a boy name picked out and I think we finally decided on a girl name, maybe. I'm sure it will probably change. 
Those are all my updates for now! I have a doc appointment this week so hopefully I will have more fun stuff to write about.

Friday, March 18, 2011


This is how the past couple weeks have been for me-


and when I get lucky


Its been a pretty crappy couple of weeks, and I feel even more sorry for Ellie cause she has a momma that just lays there on the couch all day and twitches every so often. Ardie is usually pretty good company for her sometimes, when they aren't stealing each others toys or Ellie isn't trying to squeeze his head off.
I'm totally going to make up for it as soon as I start feeling better, I swear.
I feel like the stinkiest momma ever.

But other than that Ellie seems pretty excited about it all. Every so often she squeals at the top of her lungs and says, "MOMMY IS HAVING A BABY!"

She defiantly needs a sibling. She hates playing alone. I'm so excited just to give her a little brother or sister. I'm excited for all the little shenanigans they will get into together. Having brothers and sisters is the best.

So far, this pregnancy has been nothing like my last. I puked a lot with my last pregnancy but I don't remember feeling nauseous ALL day EVERY day like I do now.

I literally can smell anything and everything, and I really hate the smell of our apartment. I can hardly even go in the kitchen. Ellie has terrible breath, I make her brush her teeth all the time. I want to punt Ardie every time he gets close to me. Obviously I'm not very loving right now.

That's another thing with this pregnancy, HOLY Miss Grumpy Pants. I even asked Jordon if I was grumpy with my last pregnancy and he said that he can't remember, which means I wasn't because he would totally remember something like that.

If Jordon and Ellie still love me after this it will be a miracle.

My cravings have been really weird. I will crave something until I get it and then as soon as I eat it I will never want to eat it again. Once I ate like six pickles, defiantly wont be eating those for awhile those things hurt coming back up :S. I was craving burnt pizza once but couldn't eat the cheese and sauce so all I ate was the crust. Salt & vinegar chips, hot dog, root beer, potatoes potatoes potatoes, I don't even know what else its been very random. I cannot stand Italian food, or any type of salad dressing. Which completely sucks for me because Jordon is a ranch-a-holic. He isn't allowed to get close to me whenever he eats it. Tomato sauce and cheese has been the most repulsive combo to me. I sure hope it doesn't stay like this!

But lately I have been doing a little better and have been able to actually get off the couch. Lately its been more puking that nausea, which is totally ok with me, it feels a lot better.

I had my first doctors appointment on Tuesday. With Tri-care we have to be 'referred' to a doctor first and if we don't like that doctor we have to go through the whole referral process again. LAME. But good news is is that so far I like this doctor's office. It's the office for only Fort Drum. They have midwives and ob/gyn, but they only let you go to the ob/gyn if your high risk, which I'm totally ok with cause I want to go to a midwife. The midwife they sent me to is the 'head midwife' I guess. He is in the military. (Does anyone else think that's totally weird?) So he was all in uniform and what not, and I have to call him Major instead of Doctor... weird. I don't know if I will ever get the hang of this military stuff. ANYWAYS geeze I'm totally rambling. Sooo he was a pretty nice guy, a little ok A LOT on the weird side, but super nice! He is also being stationed somewhere else in July so I will be getting a different doctor anyways.

I got to see the little peanut in my belly! It was a super short ultrasound but fun. At first the babes was sleepin away and the Doctor shook my belly like crazy and the lil nugget rolled over and stretched out his itty bitty legs and went back to sleep. The doctor said it's probably a boy since he is so lazy!

Oh p.s Jordon is in Virginia right now so me and Ellie had to go on this little adventure on our own. So Ellie was strapped in her stroller through the whole appointment. It was pretty awesome as soon as we got in the room there were nursing pictures ALL over the room. So Ellie had lots of questions. No worries I was totally mature about the whole thing. Luckily I had my phone and let her play games on it to keep her distracted.

 If you have ever had a baby you know all the fun stuff you get to do at your first appointment. Well while in the middle of my PAP SMEAR Ellie yells out, "MOMMY MOMMY I HAVE TO PEE!" Yeah, its not like I could just jump up and take her to the bathroom in my sweet paper robe that opened in the front. So I just keep telling her, "Please try and hold it baby, you just gotta hold it for a bit."

No go. During the whole thing she was yelling out, "Mommy I'm gonna pee! Mommy I can't hold it. Mommy I just peed!" Yeah. She peed her pants in the middle of my pap smear. Totally awesome.

Well I'm 12 weeks pregnant and my due date is September 30th! WOO! Hopefully this baby will be rad and stick close to that date so Daddy can be with us longer! Its so amazing to see that there really is a baby in there and your not miserable for nothing! I think I finally believe I'm pregnant now :)